My Thoughts On Roger Ebert

I'm grateful for all that this legendary writer has done. To call him an inspiration is an understatement.

My first love was writing. Going as far back as grade school, I mostly looked forward to sitting down to write rather than taking any test or participating in most extracurricular activities. I was even made fun for always having a book nearby. Of course, things changed when music and movies became the priority.

One of the reasons that happened was due to a few people. You’d think I would say my father but honestly, he was more of an outdoorsy sports guy. He did love some movies but not the extent that me or my mother did. Still, I rarely liked the same kind of movies my mother liked. There was one person in particular that I’ve mentioned several times and he even appeared on a recent episode of Director’s Club. WGN’s Nick Digilio was a staple to my Saturday morning routine. It included breakfast made by my dad with AM720 on the radio and I’d listen to Nick and Roy Leonard review movies.

Of course he wasn’t the only one that influenced my eventual obsession. Like most Chicago-based critics around my age, I was also raised on Siskel & Ebert. I made it a point to make that appointment viewing. Didn’t really care about politics or the news, I just wanted to hear what Roger Ebert and Gene Siskel had to say about the latest releases so I can make a mental note of what to see soon.

As far as back as 1990, I started collecting the Roger Ebert’s Home Movie Companion books which collected his reviews from the previous year. I read that along with the Videohound Guide like bibles. Movies became my source of spiritual comfort so it made sense that I would devour those books in particular. In fact, my dad (who worked in downtown Chicago at Ameritech) went out of his way to get one of them signed by Ebert himself at the local B.Dalton. He signed it as “To Jim, Maybe take this book over one day, just not too soon. To a true movie fan - Roger.”

It felt like my very first celebrity autograph that had special meaning to me. My dad knew how much movies meant to me going all the way back to 1985 when him and I saw and loved Back To The Future. But it was around the early 90s when things changed and I started treating cinema like a school subject. For the most part, aside from English and Film Studies, high school was pretty boring and unengaging. The real education came from Nick Digilio, Roger Ebert, Dann Gire.

It is still surreal to me that someone like Nick would end up supporting me to where I appeared on the same radio station. Then in 2003, I went to my first Lake Street Screening for the film, Gigli. Guess who was sitting in the back row in his favorite chair? The other hero of mine: Roger Ebert. Suffice to say, my thoughts often veered into, “this is insane” rather than being engaged by the latest Afflect/J.Lo picture. Never did I think I would be here and sometimes imposter syndrome still kicks in, mainly due to the fact that it’s hard for me to be critical. Maybe that’s why it’s remained a hobby instead of a full-blown career but my love of writing, film, and the arts will never go anywhere as long as I’m still breathing.

Roger's chair - Lake Street Screening Room. Taken days after his passing.

A few years before that, I went to the Chicago Film Critics Association Awards back when they used to do an extravagant awards show to the point of flying in nominees and winners. It was at this awards show that I first shook hands with Roger Ebert. I remember Nick pointing him out to me. He was standing there talking with others with Chaz’s arm in his. I of course had to finally introduce myself as an aspiring film critic.

Roger replied, “Aspiring film critic, huh? It’s not always easy being a writer but when you see a great film, that makes it all worth it. Best of luck to you.” I was only a couple of years out of high school and unsure what I wanted to do. Yes I loved to write and of course I had turned into a true blue cinephile, but I mainly only saw myself rambling to people about my thoughts on opinions than sitting down to do what Roger did. He set the bar so high.

I’m surprised that Danny Peary or Dave Kehr never came my way around this time. Maybe they would have if I had gotten a bit out of my comfort zone with reading and following Roger. Obviously, there have been a lot of notable critics over the years but Roger’s writing somehow connected with me the most. He would often turn inward, making the review very personal. He wasn’t shy about his criticisms and overall opinion but his voice was always direct, well-written, confident and intelligent. He made you want to be a better writer. Nick of course made me want to be a better communicator (which maybe why podcasting became an eventual course of action).

When it comes to Roger though, I didn’t approach him that much when I did attend screenings. Honestly, I can’t recall for sure if he was the memorable screening I went to for Spike Lee’s 25th Hour. Perhaps he was there or this was around the time he had fallen ill. Maybe I was a little intimidated or feared he wouldn’t necessarily think much of this young aspiring film critic who struggled to find his voice.

I tried writing for Efilmcritic.com and regularly talking on WGN Radio but 2002 was a rough year. My dad had recently passed and I couldn’t focus. I couldn’t sit down to write reviews. I eventually had to take time off. It seems like there’s always been a period where I want to be a film critic, but then a few years off allows me to recharge my batteries again. Nevertheless, I think of the fact that Roger wrote a slew of reviews every single week. Sometimes they would be scathing takedowns, other times, you can sense his love and appreciation of the art form with every sentence.

Not to mention that he could not only write, but he was an articulate, passionate commentator. I can’t remember which DVD commentary came first: Dark City or Citizen Kane but I listened to them both. It’s wild to think that it’s been 25 years since Dark City came out but he loved that one more than most if memory serves. He was able to say things about certain films in ways that very few could. The most memorable review I still cite as one of the most important in my life is when he wrote about his avid love for Synecdoche, New York. He called it the best film of the decade and I of course, whole-heartedly agree.

“If we don't "go to the movies" in any form, our minds wither and sicken.”

“The movie is about how and why the stuff that happens--happens. Might as well try to describe the plot of Ulysses in 800 words or less. All you can do is try to find a key. Just in writing that, I think I have in a blinding flash solved the impenetrable mystery of Joyce's next novel, Finnegans Wake. It is the stream of conscious of a man trying to write Ulysses and always running off to chase cats.” - Roger Ebert

Over time, Synecdoche, New York has become my 2nd favorite movie of all time. I wonder if a lot of that has to do with Roger Ebert and the way even he couldn’t necessarily write a conventional review for something that had that much emotional resonance. I kind of fear writing about that one and Mulholland Drive the most because both I felt were “good” but not great with one viewing. Suddenly, they became my two favorite movies for reasons that are hard to put into words. It just sort of happened. Falling in love with movies and criticism also just sort of happened. A lot of that has to do with people Roger Ebert.

It’s been ten years since he passed. Roger has written so many insightful reviews it’s hard to list them all or include quotes here. Of course, RogerEbert.com upholds and maintains his legacy by having some of the best critics out there doing what they do best, with the help and support and encouragement of one Brian Tallerico, another one of the all-time best film critics that I’m grateful to know. It makes sense that he’s carrying the torch and doing great work on his own but what him and Chaz are doing with that website really does exemplify the joy and spirit of film writing. Roger would’ve approved and have been proud.

I still think it’s hard to sit down to write something every week. Roger was born to be a writer, an enthusiast, a historian, a champion of great art. For me, it’s hard to just focus entirely on one passion or hobby because I love so much about life. Especially when it comes to the arts. I do think people like Dann, Nick, Roger and filmmakers like Tarantino and Paul Thomas Anderson did change my life by showing me that you can channel your excitement into words whether spoken or written in a way that adds another layer to your own personal identity - something that is often very much in flux.

Movies are a part of our lives, for some it is an extension of what we think and feel about the world, both outside and inward. People like Roger felt like film scholars and professors that make a meaningful impact - they aren’t necessarily saying in a way to placate you, “hey you’re great, don’t give up.” They’re real with you - “it’s not easy being a writer.”

Roger was right. He was right about a lot of things. I mostly agreed with him, looked forward to whatever he had to say about movies and certainly wished I had approached him more when I could for advice, wisdom or just to talk movies. Luckily, I’ve been able to do that with a lot of Chicago film critics who continue to be an inspiration. But of course, a lot of that inspiration started with Roger Ebert. Instead of me trying to summarize how much he meant to me, he should have the last word because he wrote (and spoke) so many great ones. He’ll be forever missed. I am forever grateful that his reviews have always been a part of my life.

“Movies are the most powerful empathy machine in all the arts. When I go to a great movie I can live somebody else's life for a while. I can walk in somebody else's shoes. I can see what it feels like to be a member of a different gender, a different race, a different economic class, to live in a different time, to have a different belief. This is a liberalizing influence on me. It gives me a broader mind. It helps me to join my family of men and women on this planet. It helps me to identify with them, so I'm not just stuck being myself, day after day. The great movies enlarge us, they civilize us, they make us more decent people.” - Roger Ebert (1942 - 2013)